Joke of thye day... apparently

John Howard is on a skiing trip - Christmas holidays, Aspen, the whole thing.

He's coming down the slopes and then in the snow written - obviously someone has relieved themselves in the snow - and written, "John Howard is a dork".

Well, John stops in front of it and looks at it absolutely fuming and says to the secret service guys who are sort of shadowing him while he's on his holiday in Aspen: "Look into this. I want to know who did it, under what circumstances." They say, "Yes sir" and he went off skiing.

That night the forensic guys have taken a sample of the thing in the snow. They go to him, "Well, Mr Prime Minister, we've got good news and bad news.

"We've tested the urine samples and we've come to a conclusion. What do you want - good or bad news?"

And he said, "Well, what's the good news?"

And they said, "Well, it's Kim Beazley's urine".

And he said, "Well, what's the bad news?"

And they said, "Well, it was in Janette's handwriting".